Waiting game

I am bored out of my skul and waiting for news that never comes. Agony! I am just so ready for something that feels as though it will never happen to happen, like a kid waiting for Christmas, it never comes quick enough. The best way to describe it is using a term my mom always said, "rutchy". Anxious in PA Dutch (and Yiddish, I later learned).

Fingers crossed the news comes soon or I may explode.

NICOLE WEIGHT LOSS CHALLENGE: I lost half a pound, probably from the rock wall climbing yesterday. Whoot whoot!

And.......scene.

The baby has been completely emptied of stuffing, turned inside-out and abandoned. Say goodbye to $2.99.

Poor unbaptized, dead baby. Too bad the Pope took away Limbo, this dead baby is cursed to roam the earth as an undead soul.

And so is the lifespan of the Rufus baby. Someone should make a National Geographic special on this topic.

Baby Update 2

Stuffing removed, check

Squeaker box removed and punctured, check

I took advantage of Rufus's absence (with baby) to clean up the stuffing mess.

Baby update

We are up to the pull-out-baby-stuffing phase. In this shot he is mutilating the squeaker.

TGIF!

I am working from home today because:

a) it's Friday and is supposed to get over 70 degrees out today, with sun
b) I had a Webex training schuled at 7 am so I rolled out of bed at 6:50 and logged on sans the 45 minute commute
c) because I can

The Roommate is coming down with a cold my dear friends have been kind enough to pass around our groop so I interrupted my training to run to the drugstore to get their version of Airborne (on sale 3 for ten bucks!) and picked up a cute little fox chew toy for my darling Rufus. This little squeaking piece of fabric has made him sooooooo happy. He's pacing around the house with it in his mouth, whimpering and occasionally stopping to squeak it. This is the honeymoon phase of the relationship. Pure bliss, and it will probably last about 20 minutes. Next comes the phase where he shakes it violently for about 5 minutes which is followed by the tear-it's-guts-out phase, which usually takes about 1 minute. This is followed by the me-cleaning-up-the-cotton-batting phase, followed by Rufus tossing around the unstuffed carcase for a month until the Roommate finally give it a proper burial (like the Moffia, dumped in a trash can). I wish $2.99 could make me so happy for so long.

Ok, lets step back a moment to the top of this post where I listed my reasons for working from home today. Point #2 mentions a mandatory two hour billing training I was required to either attend yesterday at noon or this morning at 7 am. Our corporate office is on the East Coast and the training department evidentally can't recall our company having offices on the West Coast, so mandatory training only offered at the traditional lunch hour or before office hours isn't an issue for anyone. Just wanted to voice that opinion. Also, evidently working in total darkness isn't a problem either, but I digress.

And finally, a recap from last night's foray into the monthly art walk, Last Thursday, a few blocks from our house. We did our usual walk to the first bar we came across and planted our asses on bar stools the entire night. We never seem to make it to any art booths, but no matter. Anyway, had we walked about 12 blocks further we would have been in the middle of this ruckus. I guess we're lucky we are easily distracted by booze.

Have a great weekend! Tomorrow night I'll be heading out to Newberg to watch my oldest friends graduate. He's been going to school to get his bachelor's off and on for the last 25 years. The funniest part is he's a devout atheists and he has had the privilege of attending a Christian college in Texas as well as a Christian college here in Oregon, from which he will be graduating in fact. Seems Christians accept more earned credits than regular colleges. Congrats Mark! Job well done (as in takes longer, like with steaks). Wonder if this chick is in his class. Maybe they should date.

Man...

I am pooped. Turning pissed off customers into happy customers is HARD WORK, but alas, it's a way of life at H & K, I tell ya. I did have a pain=-in-the-ass customer fire me yesterday, wants a different care rep. PERMISSION GRANTED! Too bad I already fixed all his whiny-assed billing issues, but he's not my problem anymore. Another of my customers is leaving for another provider and I wanted to tell her "Not surprised, I didn't think you were a moron". So that's been my life today---aching legs, feet and head. Nothing that a chilled glass of "pink wine" can fix (70 calories).

Speaking of the diet thing, didn't do too well today. Started off with instant rice noodles (sans oil) but went to hell from there. On my way to a customer appointment I drove through Jack in the Crack for fried chicken chunks. Bad, very bad. But in a good way, but at least I hit the gym after. Tomorrow is another day.

Happy Last Thursday!

Fatty fatty 2 x 4, can't fit through the kitchen door.

I made the mistake of opening up my big mouth and volunteered to be diet-support in Nicole's weight loss venture. And by support I don't mean sitting on the sidelines and chanting "Go Nicole, don't eat!", that would be too easy, I actually have to set a goal and lose the weight as well. And it's not that I don't want to be supportive or anything, I just don't want to have to work out more or make any changes to my normal cheese/bread/wine diet. Like most folks I'm all about the wanting to lose weight and not-so-all-about doing something about it. I am a "I want it when I want it" kind of gal.

Most would say I don't even need to lose weight but I have added to my girth (3-5 lbs) since quitting smoking (2 years ago) and since I am OLDER (as in older than most of you) it is harder to drop the lbs when I desire. When I was younger I would simply skip a dinner here or there and stay at my desired weight. Not so easy any more.

So, I guess I'll go to the gym today and weigh myself and then set a goal. I forgot to ask Nicole how much time I had to whittle away my fat, so I better drop it quick. She's way younger than me so I need a head start.

UPDATE:

Weighed myself at the gym and I wasn't as bad off as I had thought. I am shooting for 2 lbs, not a lot I know but the stuborn few are harder than big poundage. I was going to say I have a small frame but I'm 5'10" so I guess small isn't really accurate but I do have small bones, so the 2 lbs will take me to where I was a few years ago. I won't tell you how much I weigh (or how little for that matter) as it always gets me in trouble. "Twig girl" and "strong wind will blow you away" are usual answers.

Good luck!

I almost forgot...

My buddy Rusty (far left, although far right is also a Rusty) called me Sunday morning to let me know he ran into Rufus Wainwright on Broadway in Seattle. Our Rusty is having a birthday soon and I had already decided to tell the tale of the first time Rusty met Rufus in a few weeks for Rusty's birthday post, so I'll not touch that subject this time around but keep posted in May. Last year for his birthday I did the Rusty Blog-a-thon, so I had to come up with something else this year. Stay tuned.

Sometimes this shit just writes itself.

When I came into the office this morning my first thought was "The damn lights are still out" until I noticed only the lights directly above the row of cubes I live in were out. So once again I was a little miffed (happens a lot here). When I loudly grumbled about the lack of lights a voice from another cube suggested that perhaps the lack of lights was directly associated with our lack of quota attainment at our branch, which I found amusing to say the least.

Flash back to about 2 months ago:
I think I mentioned a while ago that our office was under construction, which necessitated my working from home the majority of that time (and wasn't THAT sweet). H&K gave up around 60% of our office space to our neighbor, a company specializing in space-age bandages, who is experiencing a real boom of business thanks to our foolish leader's mis-step into Iraq. A mere 8 feet from my cube is a wall which until the construction did not exist. The Miracle Bandage Company is on the other side.

Flash forward to this morning:
After the laughter subsided from the quota comment and about 20 minutes passed, the lights above my row of cubes mysteriously came on. I mused aloud that perhaps the light switch controlling our lights were in fact on the other side of the wall and we'd have to wait for miracle bandage company to come in every morning and remind them to turn on our lights by banging on our separation wall. One of our sales reps walked next door to ask the electricians working on miracle Band-Aid's wiring to look into our mysterious lighting issues. Well, sure enough, our lights are controlled on the miracle Band-Aid's side of the new wall. I guess life IS stranger than fiction, and funnier.

In more office news we finally have power in our newly constructed break room but now the industrial-sized (do we need one with 4 burners for 8 employees?) coffee machine does not work. Seems a sales rep "had to break it" yesterday because it wouldn't stop making coffee, just continued with it's flow long after the pot wass full, causing it to spill all over the floor. No one ever said sales guys were smart.

So, let's recap the office events thus far this week (and it's only TUESDAY):
Unstoppable cascade of ice from freezer + uncontrollable lights (or complete lack there of) + over-achiever coffee maker = THIS PLACE IS POSSESSED! All electronic appliances are to cease and desist.

Someone unplug the Xerox machine before it takes over!

UPDATE!

I stepped out of the office to get some sudafed and when I came back ALL the lights are out again. I kid you not.

Where was Suz when the lights went out?

I haven't posted much about work because I am in CYA mode, but after 5 weeks of being run out of cubes and working from home because of all the construction here I am just about at my wit's end. The overhead lights went out about an hour and a half ago and I (along with a few coworkers) have been working from laptop screen light. That's all the light we have here. Talk about stupid. The here is what the office looks like if you aren't looking directly at your computer screen. Can't print anything since the circuit the printer is on is dead. This after opening the freezer door in the break room only to be buried alive by a cascade of ice cubes because some mental giant removed the cube collecting basket without turning off the ice cube maker and evidently it made ice cubes all weekend that were held in place by the closed door until I released them. Yep, it's Monday. Enjoy.

I'm going to go to the break room and open the freezer door again. I want to experience what an ice avalanche felt like to Helen Keller.

UPDATE: After 2 hours squinting in the dark I went home. Because working in the dark is dumb unless you have a job in a theater or bat cave.

What about the dead babies?

In a rare show of intelligence, the Vatican has decided that the imaginary holding area, Limbo, does not in fact exist.

So glad we got that ironed out. Next up, original sin!

I'm still here...

I admit it, I have been quite lax in my posting as of late (reading your daily blogs as well) but the sad truth is I have been putting WORK ahead of my personal internet perusing. Yeah, still trying to figure that one out. Anyway, here's an update:

Today I got to sit through a system training with one caveat, the system we were being trained on was down at the time of our training session so we had "use your imagination exercise" training. I feel very confident I am not comfortable using this system in the future.

I am working from home today, unfortunately with a gassy dog.

It is beautiful out today in Portland (above photo taken just now) and the cloudless sky should continue through late evening......until early morning Saturday when it starts raining, non-stop mind you, for the remainder of the weekend. Yea, I love the little work day tease followed by a soggy weekend. Good news is it should clear up on Tuesday but the 10 day says rain again next weekend. Just call me Debby Downer.

I feel like I am way behind the ball on the "copycat school terror" bullshit that's been sweeping across the country since the events Monday at Virginia Tech. Seems everyone's doing it but me, so how will I ever get Anderson Cooper to put me on 360? Too bad I don't go to school----or own a gun for that matter. I suspect I shall never be cool (especially if I keep using the word "shall"). On a related note, if you ever saw Gus Van Sant's movie "Elephant", a movie about a high school where a group of kids do just what that crazy shit did on Monday, you probably have an idea of what the school building where the story too place looked like. Well, Elephant was filmed just 2 blocks directly behind the Roommate's house and while I've been working from home the last month or so I have been treated to the almost constant banging and jackhammering going on as a crew demolishes the structure. I'll try to get a photo of the huge pile of rubble.

Have a grand weekend, all!

More Red Dress Party Pics

Evidently the promoters of the Red Dress Party got fined last year by the Fire Dept because the venue was over capacity. The official headcount was 1,600 people although it is pretty much common knowledge that there were far more folks than that there last year. Because of the overcrowding issue it was decided that only 1,200 tickets would be sold this year. That's a lot of red fabric.

Put a red dress on a guy and had him a bunch of free booze and all hell breaks loose.

Look at cute Frankie in his school girl get up.

My friend Pat was the main sponsor this year, so we scored the VIP tickets.

Thanks Pat!

Looks like Bosch's Garden of Earthly Delights.

Even Erin got into the act (act being red dress).

Sam made his own get up, guess he didn't break the back on the fabric purchase.

Um, Frankie, I don't think that's very lady-like.

This reveler wasn't with our party but warranted a photo none the less.

Happy Red Dress Weekend!

Red Dress Season Photo Essay

Red

Dress

Party

If you've been reading House of Suz for the last year you will most likely remember the Red DressPosts from 2006. Well, it's April so if you're in our extended group of friends you found it necessary to go to Ross Dress for Less last week to pick up your frock for this year's party.

Seeing guys in dresses is funny.

And is worth the cover charge alone. We pre funked at Miss D's house and then headed out to the venue.

This poor dude faded way too early. The party opened to the "common folks" (those without VIP tickets) at nine and by the time we got there around 11, this guy was already "done". (Some of these photos are cloudy because the flash reflection off the smoke machine.)

When not in the VIP area, we pretty much hung out outside, under the Hawthorne Bridge. We had a tent area with it's very own heat lamp since most of us were skimply dressed.

Good times, good times. Stay posted for more photos.

Yes, I am still alive.

It has been brought to my attention that I haven't been posting regularly of late and to that I say "DUH", I've been busy with work and other stuff but I'm not going to make excuses about it, just gonna squeeze out a quick post before the mob carrying torches encircles my house threatening to burn the place down if I don't post.

So here it is. Ta da.

And while I've got your attention, this weekend is the annual Red Dress Party and I expect it will be even grander than last year. Look for a post about the event....sometime.

Got to get back to work now, maybe you should too, huh?

Martha Stewart kiss my fluffy white tail.

I know you all are chomping at the bit to see the photo essay covering the egg decorating contest but I am pressed for time, so here's a photo essay about the meatloaf (turkey) I made for Easter dinner.

We were going to do Jesus but a bunny seemed more edible, plus we didn't have a big enough pan. You're looking at 5 pounds of ground turkey there. This is what happens when you mix a joy of cooking with an over-active imagination and 4 years of art school.

Look at that attention to detail, right down to the carrot in it's mouth! Wait, what's that you say? You are wondering where it's cute cotton tail is?

There you go, just like a cotton tail, only edible! It's made out of mashed potatoes!

Unfortunately someone shoved some chives in the poor thing's eyes, meaning them to be whiskers, but the wine had been flowing for hours, so someone's aim was a little off.

So I hope you had a happy Easter! No bunnies were harmed in the making of this post.

Thank god it's almost Friday!

For those of you who hate a Rufus post (not naming names but one of your names starts with the letter "Leigh" and the other starts with the letter "Tammy") here is a lovely photo of my precious Rufus, taken just this morning. Isn't he cute? This is my "Rembrandt Rufus", (click on the photo for more detail) all contrast of light and dark and kind of a "self portrait" feel about it just like the artist often used. I am pretty pleased with this shot. And no I didn't tease his hair to make it all crazy-like for the photo shoot, it's naturally like that. That dog is so smart, he knows to sit super still when I pull out the tripod (since I don't use a flash in this kind of natural light); he understands the basic principals of photography, as well as calculus and brain surgery.

The weather here today is just about perfect; it's sunny and warm and should be in the mid 70's by late this afternoon. Unfortunately the beautiful/sunny ain't sticking around for the weekend so I must take advantage today and tomorrow.

Although the Roommate and I are far from religious we are celebrating Easter with an egg decorating contest (just like last year) and the like. I am planning on making a (turkey) meatloaf shaped like a 3-D Easter Bunny. Should be fun.

Ok, I'm rambling, I know. Just kind of anxious and easily distracted. I have 3 e-mail I've started and haven't finished any of them and am skittering around like a ping-pong ball in a drier as far as work goes. And basically not getting anything done. Maybe I should go outside and sit in the sun.

Excellent idea, Suz.

Message in a bottle.

I was stuck without an idea for today's post and as luck would have it I was given a mission from VE. Here is my thank-god-I-just-happened-to-pack-this list in the unlikely event I am stranded on a deserted island.

One ipod song: Well, considering I am the only person on the face of the earth that doesn't own an ipod and would I likely need a solar powered laptop to charge it, I'm going to suspend disbelief and say the Police's "Message in a Bottle", for obvious reasons.

One DVD: Again that solar powered laptop will come in handy here (thank god I invented it before I left home) I think the one DVD I could really use is the complete Gilligan's Island series. Excellent reference guide on making coconut phones and the like.

One book: Obviously the bible, since I never read it. Ooops, surely it's not cool to josh about the good book. I would pick Johnathan Franzen's "The Corrections" since it's the only book I've ever purchased and just couldn't get through. Luckily I've brought it on this trip although because of it's size it is considered my carry-on luggage.

One type of drink: Bottled water. Surprised you there, huh? Well it just so happens I am stranded with Jesus, so I can have my water and drink wine too.

One kind of meal: Spaghetti. I guess.

One dessert: Wine, I'm not a huge fan of sweets. This is just in case Jesus is lazy about the water to wine thing.

One toiletry item: Razor, I hate hairy armpits. But in case I just happened to have it all lasered off before my trip, shampoo.

One photograph: Hmmm, I guess this one since I think it just might cheer me up.

Anyone who wants to play along feel free. Let me know in comments so I can read yours.

To suck or not to suck, that is the answer.

Taking my cue from Lola, the House of Suz list of 10 things that suck and 5 that don't.

First the suckers, in no particular order:

1. Bush and his cronies (ok, this is #1 on purpose)
2. Empty wine bottles
3. Cramps
4. Dead end jobs that suck the life out of you
5. Most Mondays
6. The end of vacations that find you in a cab to the airport, crying
7. Empty checking accounts when there's still checks left
8. Online orders that take too long to arrive and then don't fit or disappoint in some other way
9. Senseless deaths (as though there are any really deaths that make sense)
10. Flat tires, or having to replace tires in general. We'll file this one under "tires" just to cover all bases.

And now, things that don't, similar order description:

1. Happy boys, especially the Roommate and Rufus
2. Unexpected bonus checks
3. Summer and roof-off-the-Jeep-for-three-months
4. Oregon Pinot Noir
5. Possibilities

Dinner done gone

If there's one thing I can do well, it's gotta be making a frickin' excellent lasagna. And if there's one thing the Roommate can do exceptionally well, it's eat, anything really but I gotta tell ya he can put a hurting on one of my lasagnas.

As I've mentioned before, I "action cook" meaning I tend not to follow recipes therefore I never make a dish the same way twice. Yesterday evening I made two lasagnas and as of 22 hours later, this is all that remains of the first---say your prayers for the second (and these are normal sized lasagnas, here). Somehow the combination of the ingredients and their portions hit critical mass and a masterpiece was born. I'm getting hungry just looking at the photo. Boytek, I know you are hoping for a smidgen of lasagna come Friday night but it ain't looking good.

I'd offer to give you the recipe but you'd be sorely disappointed. Awe, what the hell, here goes:

House of Suz secret lasagna
around a pound of ground turkey
6 turkey Italian sausage (roommate doesn't eat pork or beef), casing removed
many cans with tomato stuff in them in (as in paste, sauce and whole), more the merrier
big ass onion
garlic, enough to choke a vampire
enough salt
enough pepper
more fresh basil than you'd expect
fresh oregano
big box of lasagna noodles
ricotta cheese (here's a secret, I used more than I usually do and you can tell. Yum!)
mozzarella cheese (same here)
Parmesan cheese (duh, it's cheese! Tons!)
throw away pans because I ain't cleaning up too

Prepare and bake. Eat all in one serving. Evidently serves 2 although I believe the Roommate could have killed it off alone if necessary.

Evidently I am not destine to be a cook book writer.

I'm gonna eat. Bon appetite, ya'll!

These are a few of my favorite things......

Hints, tips and things I like.

Aveda's Shampure shampoo and conditioner is fabulous but if you don't like even the faintest hint of patchouli then you may want to try their Rosemary Mint shampoo and conditioner instead.

Try Ranch Style Beans instead of baked beans at your next BBQ; the unique taste will make you glad you did. Try adding onions or even a finely chopped jalapeno for extra flavor. This is the real thing, made in Fort Worth, Texas and in the Pacific Northwest you can find them at Fred Meyers (where they are relabeled as Ranch Style Texan Beans because we might not get it without the "Texas" part).

Desert Essence makes the best lip balm ever in their Lip Rescue with Shea Butter; I couldn't find it on their web site but you can probably find it at a Whole Foods or a similar shop. It's even better than Aveda's Lip Saver, although Desert Essence's lip balm doesn't glow under black light like the Aveda version does, which is kinda fun if you happen to frequent cosmic bowling night.

Love a nice Oregon Pinot Noir? Try ordering online from my buddies at Cork. Cottonwood's 2003 Marina Piper is a particular favorite.

I love the handbags made by Matt and Nat and they are animal friendly if that is important to you. Great styles to boot and they have an attaching key ring in each bag.

I like finding out secrets and you can do that here. Post Secrets is a weekly obsession of mine.

Everyone knows I love Rufus Wainwright but I have to admit that my favorite of his albums is probably Poses. Beautiful music and the haunting songs bring back equally beautiful memories of a particularly difficult time in my life.

If you're a tall female and also a stick like me, Banana Republic has EXTRA TALL SIZES!!!!! Perhaps my life of "high waters" is over.

.....and that makes me happy.